It's a Great Day for Baseball


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Friday, December 05, 2003

Once there was a way to get back homeward
Once there was a way to get back home
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Golden slumbers fill your eyes
Smiles awake you when you rise
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Once there was a way to get back homeward
Once there was a way to get back home
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Wednesday, December 03, 2003

nick drake and old diary entries and he left me posts and we were friends and she sat with me in the grass and we talked about boys and i remember when she was an angel for halloween and her wings had real feathers and she made me watch "meet your meat" and so i drew a squirrel for her in my journal and i went with him to homecoming but he stared at her the whole time and i knew that it was so right and now it's all so wrong and nothing should have happened and i should have said something but i never did and i owe her so much because she put her hand on my shoulder when i was sad and i need to be nicer to people like she was and she doesn't know how many people miss her and i want him to be okay and when he is i want him to learn that it wasn't his fault and it will never be his fault and i want him to leave me notes again and call me "anna" for fun and bitch to me about mrs miller and we can sit in the back of mr barnes class again and roll our eyes when he screams "i am spartacus" and we can go back to summer and i can meet him at polar ice like i said i would so we could fall over and laugh at sir mix-a-lot and the 7th grade whores and when we pondered the demise of taking back sunday and had a moment of silence and "i don't know, but look at you" and life is too wonderful to forget and i never want to forget how much i love them and love you and how i wish that things didn't ever happen and how i hate myself for not believing it and when i finally did i just sort of sat there when what i should really do is put my hands on other peoples' shoulders because they are sad like i am and if i help others then we can all be happy again someday but for now tears will stain my journal and i'll draw her another squirrel and tell everyone i love them because tomorrow is a new day.

i could have said something instead i laughed i could have loved instead i moved away i could have danced but i stood by the wall i could have cared but instead i worried i could have been there instead i lied to the world i could have done a million things and i did nothing but sit here day after day contemplating my own stupid life when really there is so much more to think about and i just sit here and the leaves change color and the world goes around and people leave and i know that but they are not supposed to leave now.

::takes breath. shuts eyes::


Tuesday, December 02, 2003

Well, my sniffles got the best of me. I stayed home from school today, which was unexpected and quite nice. Yum, green tea and hot soup. I found out that I don't really have to make up too much work either, from my friends who called me at lunch.

I love you, friends. Do I tell you that enough? No. You guys seriously rock my socks. If it wasn't for you, there would be no Blockbuster-popsicle-buying or Hard-Day's-Night-squealing or my-one-act-directing or hyper-RE-teaching or Josh-Groban-ranting or homework-helping or late-night-drives-in-LucytheCar-Format-listening or 2 am-spastic-UCLA-application-avoiding or NYU-roommate-anticipating or Les-Miserables-obsessing or elevator-labbing or You're-A-Good-Man-Charlie-Browning or The-Book-writing or posterboard-leaving or movie-that-he-doesn't-really-want-to-see-but-sees-it-anyway-with-you-watching or anything.

I'm thankful for you guys. Which, I guess, I'm a little late saying as Thanksgiving was last week. But anyway. It's true.

I'm going to go blow my nose now. hee. noseblowing. what a funny noise.

Monday, December 01, 2003

Someone help me.

I have a UCLA application due tomorrow at midnight.

I have three essays to write for it. Still.

I hate procrastination. Hate it. HATE.

And yet, 'tis my life.

Oh yeah. And a 7 page script to memorize for my FIRST HOUR CLASS tomorrow. With like a BILLION different characters.

But you know what's cool? I have my breakfast with the Beatles. hee.

Coming Soon: Railing, Roaring Rant Regarding Curt Schilling. *shudder*

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