It's a Great Day for Baseball

 

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Saturday, January 17, 2004

 
Recently, my brother Ben discovered Counterstrike, a game with an online community chock-full of thirty-year-old men whose lives revolve around it. While they send messages in the chat room like "i need backup," "hurry up!" and "fire in the hole! GO GO GO," Ben and I sent messages such as:

"so, who wants to go to prom with me? any takers?"

"so, who likes folgers in their cup?"

"check out that guy's sporty headband. any takers?"

"why are we all dressed up like germans?"

Needless to say, we were cussed out. I love making middle-aged men furious.

Wednesday, January 14, 2004

 
Today was Not A Good Day.

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I hate worrying so much.

Monday, January 12, 2004

 
I took a nap today. Therefore, I am not too tired right now. I'm just kind of trying to make my ears pop so I can actually hear the music I'm listening to. Josh sounds so far away.

Officially three weeks until he's here. Officially three weeks until he falls in love with me.

Yes, that is my plan. I will go to the concert, and he will see my face in the second row through the blinding lights of the Dodge Theater, and he will forget the words to his own songs. He will drop the microphone in awe. He will jump off the stage, take my hand, and whisper to me.

"Who are you?"

"Jaclyn."

"Jaclyn, I love you."

"Sorry, Josh. I have to go call my boyfriend."

And then he will sob and cry, for I, Jaclyn Backhaus, did turn him down. His world will spiral out of control. In a few more weeks, an E! True Hollywood Story will be in order. He will become a complete wreck.

Me? I'll get on with my life, despite being known as "That Heartbreaker."

O, travesty.
...
I'm such a dork. I think having a cold has severely affected my thinking pattern.

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